Melinda’s Story
Andrea Rock, contributing editor
Elizabeth couldn’t believe her eyes. A chaplain at a major university hospital, she had been sent to the room of a woman who had just been diagnosed with cancer. The nurses who had sent her to this patient warned her that stage 3 ovarian cancer is usually fatal, because most often it is undetectable until it is in an advanced state. At 42 years old, the patient was in the summer of her life. So Elizabeth had braced herself.
Incredibly, she walked in on a scene that one might expect to see in a Hollywood version this story. The patient’s room was awash with hats — yes, hats — ranging from the prim to the outrageous. Elizabeth joined several nurses, happy to see Melinda, giggling and prancing about in the various hats. Despite a completely bald pate, the patient was stunningly beautiful. Hollywood loves to tell great stories of triumph, but hospital chaplains see struggles that often don’t end tidily.
When quiet returned, Elizabeth heard her full story. Barely out of college, Melinda had met and married the man of her dreams, and they were blessed with three marvelous children — a son and two daughters — and considerable material comfort. Life didn’t get any better than theirs. Imagine her shock when he announced that he was leaving her for his secretary! Melinda had had no clue of his infidelity, and was stunned that he would not only leave her, but that he would walk out on his commitment to their children.
Despondent, she gave up on everything that was important to her, including her faith and her church, and sought comfort in the arms of other men. Her flings temporarily eased her pain, but left her in deeper despair. And she’d succeeded in blinding herself to the terrible example she was setting for her young adult children.
After telling Elizabeth her story, she rated her physical pain at “four” on a scale of one to ten, but her spiritual pain at a full “ten.” She was convinced that ovarian cancer and an early death were God’s punishment for her promiscuity. She needed a chaplain to confirm or allay her fear that God would never forgive her.
Elizabeth went first to the parable of the Prodigal Son, and walked through it in depth, reminding Melinda of God’s great gift to us of the forgiveness of our sins. She emphasized God’s eternal love for us, and our ability to receive His grace through our faith in Christ. She continued to visit and share the Bible with Melinda for the remainder of her month-long stay at the hospital. During that time, Melinda was hemorrhaging frequently, and the doctors believed that she had very little time left.
At the time of her discharge, she told Elizabeth that she no longer had a church affiliation, but wanted to continue her study of the Bible. She lived too far away for Elizabeth to be able to be her mentor, but a friend of a friend, as it happened, lived near Melinda’s home and agreed to visit her weekly for Bible study. Far beyond the expectations of the hospital staff, she actually improved, and recovered from some of the painful symptoms.
Beating all odds, Melinda lived another nine months. During that time, she not only come back to her faith but she led her son and daughters to be baptized members of the church. She was able to share one more Christmas with her family, and discovered a new level of joy and peace that she had not experienced even during the happiest days of her married life.
When the tumor metastasized, she invited Elizabeth out to her home to plan her funeral service. She died about four weeks later.
Hollywood might have re-written the end of this story, because we are not supposed to die in the summer of our lives. But life is not neatly tied up in bows — or dressed in fancy hats. Melinda surely died too young, but in finding herself forgiven by God, she was able to discover a new life in spite of her disease. She triumphed through it, thriving far beyond the timeline of her medical prognosis.
It was important to her that her adult children knew, after her death, that she had not been afraid to die, thanks to her new relationship with God. At the memorial service, Elizabeth noted that “the last thing our parents teach us is how to die. By in teaching this lesson they also teach us how to live.” It was certainly true in Melinda's inspiring, unforgettable story.