Good Books
Karen Schacter, contributing editor (www.dishingwithyourdaughters.com)

Book Review: Just Between Us: A no-stress, no-rules journal for girls and their moms by Meredith and Sofie Jacobs

In my work with girls and their moms around eating, body image and self-esteem, my focus is always on the importance of the mom-daughter relationship as one of the most powerful vehicles in maintaining good health, a strong self-esteem, and positive relationships with others. (And of course, it’s not just the mom-daughter connection that’s critical, but our daughters’ connections with their dads; and our sons’ connections with both parents as well).

The connection our children feel with us is at the core of their growing up confident and healthy of body and mind.

Yet, as our children develop, and as they begin to face questions, concerns, worries and struggles around their changing bodies, romance, peer pressure, and friendships, they may not feel as comfortable coming to us as they once did. And we may not always know how to get them to talk or know the right words to say in response to their worries.

A broken heart is not as easily soothed as a skinned knee.

And as our lives get busier, and our children’s lives get filled up with homework and soccer practice, the simple fact is this: We may be too preoccupied to even be aware of when they need to talk or to listen when they are struggling to blurt something out!

This is how the lovely journal “Just Between Us: A no-stress, no-rules journal for girls and their moms” by Meredith and Sofie Jacobs came to be. One day when she was in 3rd grade, Sofie came home with lots of feelings and questions about a “crush” she had on a cute boy in her class. She struggled to get the words out to her mom. When she first tried, her mom was only half-listening, as her eyes were glued to her computer.

Later, when Meredith, her mom, tried to ask Sofie what was wrong, Sofie was too embarrassed. So she decided to write about her feelings...and a mom-daughter journal was born!

Sofie and her mom have been writing for 5 years now, and as Sofie so eloquently says, “Because of the journal, I can talk to my mom about all that awful, awkward puberty stuff and not have to face the embarrassment of saying it to her face.”

The lovely journal that Meredith and Sofie created for other moms and daughters offers guidelines (for example, “the journal is your space to say anything” and “be honest.”), blank pages, and plenty of prompts to get you and your daughter started. So if you’re not sure what to write one day, you may answer some questions about your earliest memory from your childhood or what your favorite memory of you and your daughter is.

If you’d prefer to free-flow with your writing, there’s plenty of room for that too.

Of course, you don’t need to buy a fancy journal to get started on this process. A blank notebook, kept in a sacred space, will do. Journaling with your child (girl or boy, young or older) is a beautiful way to create a deeper connection, to encourage self-expression, to help your child work through emotions, and to help him solve problems.

Other parent-child journals I love are:

(both can be found at www.journalbuddies.com, along with prompts, journaling ideas and lots of inspiration!)

For lovely blank-paged journals, you may like: www.galison.com/journals-and-diaries-C85.aspx.

So I invite you to “wake up” to your child’s (and your own) inner world and give them a gift of a lifetime — a way to communicate with you, no matter what! Go ahead, grab a pen, grab some paper, and invite your child to join you in the wonderful world of journal writing!