Learning
Something New To Feast On This Thanksgiving
by Karen Schachter, contributing editor
Offering thanks before a meal is a practice of many cultures. However, expressing gratitude is something that, for many of us, has fallen out of fashion in our day to day lives. Perhaps it is because we are living our lives so quickly. Or maybe it's because we live in a materialistic culture, where often the focus is on what we "need" more of, rather than what we already have. Most of us know when we stop and smell the roses, food tastes better, life tastes better, and our inner selves feel a greater sense of contentment.
Instilling a sense of gratitude in ourselves and in our children for the food we are eating is different than the "you better finish what's on your plate because there are children starving in Africa" - type of comparison-gratitude that you may have experienced as a child. It does no good to force gratitude by comparing oneself with others - that just creates guilt, disconnection, overeating, or power struggles.
Instead, you can help your children become aware that their food is a gift that supports their bodies - whether it is a gift from the earth, from the farmers, or from the animals. You can help your children experience greater connection with their foods and their bodies when you cultivate an attitude of thankfulness at your meals. It is much harder to overeat or to choose junk when you experience appreciation for the incredible array of foods that are available to you.
And the benefits of gratitude go beyond the table. When you are in a negative place, the changes you attempt to make through diet and exercise often backfire and consequently you end up feeling resentful and deprived. When you are in a more positive place, changes are made because you want to feel good, support your body, and take care of your health. These changes are much more likely to stick.
In addition to promoting more health-enhancing behaviors, gratitude is a key to happiness, and happiness is good for you...physically, socially and emotionally. Gratitude can help you manage stress better, may help improve depression, self-esteem, and relationships, and may even enhance your physical health and ability to recover more quickly from illness. By teaching your children to notice what is good and to take a moment to appreciate that, you are helping them develop a tool that will enhance their well-being throughout their entire lives.
A simple act of "thank you" does not necessarily cure negative feelings, disappointments, anger, or sadness. It is important to recognize our disappointments and our longings. If we focus only on those, our lives can become quite challenging. Recognizing blessings does not mean ignoring disappointments or frustrations. The two can co-exist together, and in fact, the more frustrated and depressed we feel, the more important it is to reach for an awareness of a small blessing. The more we practice gratitude, the easier it becomes to feel it more naturally.
Use Thanksgiving as a jumping-off point to think about, and talk about giving thanks.
- Take a moment to express thanks for your food during one meal a day. Or, take turns answering "What are you most grateful for today?"
- Start a "gratitude journal" - a daily practice in which you record the gifts, benefits and good things you enjoy.
- Commit to a week of not complaining.
- Express gratitude for your children and what they are doing RIGHT. Focus less on what they are not eating, or not doing, and more on the things you adore about them.
- Write a thank you note or say thank you to someone or for something that you might otherwise overlook.
When we truly feast on our food and on our lives, by waking up and noticing the bounty before us at Thanksgiving and always, we bring a sense of joy and happiness to our lives and to the lives of our family and friends.
