Learning
Beauty: It’s Not What You Think
by Karen Schachter, contributing editor
http://www.dishingwithyourdaughter.com
We live in a beauty-centered culture, especially girls and women! All around us, we are bombarded with airbrushed images and subtle (and not so subtle!) messages, reminding us that the most important thing about us is what we look like and how we measure up to the super-model in the magazine. External beauty is the standard by which we are told we should all be measured.
And we adults know, of course, that even if we buy into these messages ourselves, the marketing and advertising techniques are manipulative ways of getting us to purchase a product. We know that most women don’t look like cover models, and that beauty is more than skin-deep.
And we want our daughters to know this, too. We want her to understand that true beauty doesn’t come from the size of her body or the length of her hair; that her inner beauty is reflected in her outer glow, her confidence, and the way she cares for herself. Her true beauty comes from both honoring what she loves and being conscious of how she can inspire, support and give to other people. Girls (and women) who understand this feel beautiful, and others feel more beautiful around them!
Start walking the talk:
You may be thinking "Oh, yes, this is really important. I wish our culture didn't focus so much on outer beauty." Or: "I am going to help my daughter feel beautiful for who she is inside."
Yet, let me ask you: Are you able to acknowledge and shine your own beauty? Are you aware of how beautiful you yourself really are?
Or perhaps you're thinking: "How the heck am I supposed to be beautiful with these thighs? Or this butt? Or these wrinkles?"
How are we going to teach the next generations of girls about true beauty if we don’t really buy it ourselves?
No matter what you're thinking, I challenge you to go ahead and try something different: Stop focusing on what's wrong with your body or your face or your life, and start thinking about becoming more authentically beautiful in the world.
What is authentic beauty?
Authentic beauty is beauty that reflects the essence of you.
What makes you feel beautiful? What do you love to do? What are you naturally good at? What excites you, inspires you, and makes you feel vibrant and alive? Go ahead and start doing it. How can you begin to share this beauty with others in a bigger, bolder way so they can experience the true essence of you — and your authentic beauty?
What would happen if you held your head a little higher and let yourself stand up for something you feel is important? What would happen if you started doing something that really lit you up? What would happen if you took care of yourself — with food, how you dress, your self-care, and how you carried yourself — as if you already felt like you were beautiful enough? Because you are.
What about making someone else feel more beautiful today?
If you have a daughter or a mother or a friend, write them a letter or a note telling them what's beautiful about them. See if you can acknowledge the authentic beauty in someone around you every single day. We all thrive on being acknowledged this way!
I have a beautiful vision:
My vision is that one day, in the not too distant future, all girls and women will know they are beautiful, not because they finally achieved the look that our culture defines as beautiful, but because they are aware of, acknowledged for, and celebrated for their true beauty.
I predict that as you allow yourself to feel more beautiful, and help your daughter and all the other women around you feel more beautiful, our world will also be a more beautiful place to live. We will have lower rates of depression, suicide, obesity, eating disorders, domestic violence, teen pregnancies, and much more. And we'd all live in a world that was more peaceful, less hungry, more equal, and safer.
So go ahead: Do your part in making the world more beautiful, starting with yourself...