Learning
Giving your Children Choices
by Karen Schachter, contributing editor
http://www.dishingwithyourdaughter.com
Let’s face it, our children have to face some BIG decisions when it comes to making good grades in school and fitting in with their friends. Peer pressure or wanting to please everyone not only affects our children’s self esteem, but affects the way they make everyday decisions large or small.
This is especially true when it comes to how young girls think about their body type, and it’s particularly easy for girls to compare themselves to their peers as they enter their teenage years.
Recent research shows that 1 in 3 children are overweight, tracking children as young as 6 years old and into their late teens. Being overweight this young can lead to health risks that include diabetes, high cholesterol and other serious illnesses. Many influences can lead to children’s unhealthy eating habits including media advertising to a younger audience, peer pressure from friends, and the philosophy that food should be fast and easy.
Don’t you just want to put your arms around your child, tell them it will be just fine and make the decisions for them? We all have those moments of wanting to just jump right in. Despite those feelings, we can still be supportive and loving parents, supporting our children in making healthy decisions for themselves, and give enough space so they can soar on their own.
Changing Our Own BehaviorYes, our own behavior. It’s not uncommon that our children pick up on some of our own anxiety about how we look, how skinny we are, or what we restrict from our diets. This may mean facing some of our own hang-ups about weight and make adjustments to create a healthier way of living.
Without saying a word, when we shift our own behavior, our children will pick up on these changes, and naturally begin to change how they look at things. Then engaging our children in these changes can be an added benefit.
It’s as simple as saying, “I feel really tired in the afternoons, but instead of having a cup of coffee, today I’m going to have a green smoothie.”
Including the Whole Family
Our children love to be included, and even if they baulk at taking the trash out, our children want to be a part of the whole family.
Include your children in weekly shopping and menu planning, choosing natural and healthy foods. It’s not just the food we eat. Being conscientious about preparing and cooking meals, even planning where and when we eat is a fun way to engage our children in giving their bodies the nutrients we need.
And yes, it is also important that we give the space to allow our children to make mistakes. Giving them the chance to struggle and fail provides us the perfect opportunity to be there for them as a safety net, help teach them to grow, get back up and make better decisions, and feel good about themselves in the process.
Showing our children that despite our imperfections, we can love ourselves as we work to improve our health and our lifestyle, we can value and treat ourselves with respect, we can express our feelings and speak our mind, and we can recognize our own true value and self worth.